Well, everyone knows they die in threes. This week we lost Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and perhaps most surprising, Michael Jackson.
I’ve already been in a state of reflection this week, and the news of each of these deaths confirms what I shared on Monday at my mother-in-law’s memorial service: “We are gathered here today not because this is the exception; but because this is the rule.”
Last Friday morning, my mother-in-law, Judi’s mom, Mona Ybarra, passed out of this life. On Wednesday, June 17, she had a massive heart attack, and was on life support throughout the day on Thursday. When we received the news, we did everything we could to get our family of five packed and ready for the drive to Lancaster, CA, for an indefinite period of time.
The news was shocking. My mom-in-law was only 62, and Judi had just spoken to her not a week before her death. Neither Judi nor I have ever had to deal this closely with making the arrangements for a loved one’s burial and dealing with all the peripheral issues that accompany an unexpected death (such as dealing with an estate, going through personal effects, etc.).
Before I get too far I want to say thank you to so many of you for your prayers this past week. I believe we rode on them, and for that we are grateful. We are also grateful for other support such as meals (which so far have been awesome!) and offers to help however possible.
No matter how you feel about Facebook or Twitter, it was pretty amazing to drive on Interstate 10 and get comment after comment “buzzing” through on the Blackberry from people all over offering their encouragement. One guy even called us from Texas at 7:00 a.m. to pray for us, all because we posted what had happened while we were on the road not ten minutes prior!
While we’re getting through this, there is no doubt that Judi is missing her mom. This week I have been struck by what a strong woman my wife is. I’ve observed her step up and deal with each step of this process. Quite frankly, her strength and serenity amazes me, and I’m trying to not take it for granted. She has kept a level head and even a sense of humor in the midst of all of this even though there have been a lot of tears.
It’s easy to want to “get back to normal” in times like this, but as many of you know when you lose a parent, you can’t go back – you can only go into the “new normal.”
More than anything else, my mother-in-law’s death, for me, is evidence that life is short. No, that’s a cliché. Life, as the Bible says, is a vapor: “You are a mist that appears for a little while, and then vanishes.” (James 4:14)
When I was younger, like most people, I had deceived myself into thinking that my life would continue on this earth indefinitely. So while I was a believer in Jesus, there was no real urgency to make every moment count, because those moments will “always” be there. These days, however, I am seeing what has been true all along – my life on earth is a mist. Never before in my life have I seen the raw futility of so many pursuits I have undertaken.
Further, I am gripped by a parable that Jesus told about the deception of thinking that this life is all there is. Please read it carefully:
16And he told them a parable, saying, "The land of a rich man produced plentifully, 17and he thought to himself, 'What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?' 18And he said, 'I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. 19And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.' 20But God said to him, 'Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?' 21So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God."
Look at verse 19 – isn’t that the goal of life in the U.S.? Isn’t that what we’re all working for? But then there’s verse 20 - and you know what? That’s not the exception! Death is the rule, not some tragic twist of fate! God demanding our soul at his will is the rule – it is universal. It just seems weird to us because it hasn’t happened to us. As Randy Alcorn explains in The Treasure Principle, this life is the dot, and eternity is the line with the arrowhead on the end that proceeds from the dot. We’re living in the dot.
So when we hear of celebrities dying in threes, while understandably weird, it shouldn’t surprise us! While I would never presume to judge the soul of another, I do believe that many celebrities will fall into the category of those who have “gained the world” but have lost their soul. And that is tragic.
The point of all of this is that, as Paul says in Philippians, “to live is Christ.” Nothing matters in our lives if it is not done to bring glory to Christ. Nothing. The sooner we get that, the more we will live with wisdom, meaning, purpose, and yes, joy!
That’s what I’m learning.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
I Love Seth Godin
...becuase of posts like this one.
We can't control the economy, but we can control our aptitude and our attitude.
So there.
We can't control the economy, but we can control our aptitude and our attitude.
So there.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Big Stuff Happening...
I can't believe the year is almost half over!
I can tell summer is here because my kids are out of school. If you were a fly on the wall in our house, every five minutes you’d hear a child say: “I’m bored!” (Whatever happened to that year-round school thing, anyway?)
But let’s fast-forward past this time of vacations, backyard bbq’s, endless hours in the pool, and really high electric bills for a moment and look at a date this Fall that is going to change everything at Compass Church:
September 12th, 2009.
Save it. Mark it. Heck, tattoo it somewhere if you have to (just remember, they’re permanent!). Why?
Because September 12th, 2009 marks the beginning of Saturday Night Services at Compass Church!
Here’s how it’s going to work: This is going to be an experiment. We’re going to try it out. For 16 weeks, we’re gonna give Saturday nights a shot. If it goes great, then we’ll make it a permanent part of what we do. If it bombs, we’ll “re-evaluate”!
This is a huge opportunity for those of us who have been sitting on the sidelines to step up and get a stake in our ministry. We are going to need more guitar players, drummers, and bass players. We’re going to need more Children’s Ministry Volunteers, ushers, greeters, and everything else that makes our two services happen now.
More than anything else, we’re going to need a certain amount of people to commit to attending the Saturday night service. It would be awesome to have 150 people commit to Saturday nights. Would you be willing to make that commitment?
We’re not talking forever, just16 weeks to help us get it off the ground. If you like it, stick with it! If not, you’re free to return to Sunday mornings, but either way you’ll have been an integral part in helping us get it going.
We’re moving forward in big ways here at Compass Church! By now you know that we’ve hired Mike Szoradi as our Student Ministries Pastor. We’ll formally introduce him on Sunday, June 21st and his start date is June 29th. Mike comes to us with experience growing a student ministry from where ours is now to upwards of 90 students in a church that is much smaller than ours.
By the way, how did we decide on Mike? There are four areas that we look at with any staff hire at Compass Church:
1) Character – is this a person with excellent moral character, and are they growing in Christian maturity?
2) Call – Have they been called by God not only to ministry but to the kind of role they would be playing if they were hired?
3) Chemistry – Will this person be a good fit at Compass given our vision and values?
4) Competency – Finally, does this person have the ability to do the job not just adequately, but with excellence?
I’m excited about the fresh vision, energy, and ability that Mike will bring to our team. Again, this is all part of the larger plan to engage the community around us most effectively. I’m grateful to God and to you for making this critical piece of our ministry possible!
I can tell summer is here because my kids are out of school. If you were a fly on the wall in our house, every five minutes you’d hear a child say: “I’m bored!” (Whatever happened to that year-round school thing, anyway?)
But let’s fast-forward past this time of vacations, backyard bbq’s, endless hours in the pool, and really high electric bills for a moment and look at a date this Fall that is going to change everything at Compass Church:
September 12th, 2009.
Save it. Mark it. Heck, tattoo it somewhere if you have to (just remember, they’re permanent!). Why?
Because September 12th, 2009 marks the beginning of Saturday Night Services at Compass Church!
Here’s how it’s going to work: This is going to be an experiment. We’re going to try it out. For 16 weeks, we’re gonna give Saturday nights a shot. If it goes great, then we’ll make it a permanent part of what we do. If it bombs, we’ll “re-evaluate”!
This is a huge opportunity for those of us who have been sitting on the sidelines to step up and get a stake in our ministry. We are going to need more guitar players, drummers, and bass players. We’re going to need more Children’s Ministry Volunteers, ushers, greeters, and everything else that makes our two services happen now.
More than anything else, we’re going to need a certain amount of people to commit to attending the Saturday night service. It would be awesome to have 150 people commit to Saturday nights. Would you be willing to make that commitment?
We’re not talking forever, just16 weeks to help us get it off the ground. If you like it, stick with it! If not, you’re free to return to Sunday mornings, but either way you’ll have been an integral part in helping us get it going.
We’re moving forward in big ways here at Compass Church! By now you know that we’ve hired Mike Szoradi as our Student Ministries Pastor. We’ll formally introduce him on Sunday, June 21st and his start date is June 29th. Mike comes to us with experience growing a student ministry from where ours is now to upwards of 90 students in a church that is much smaller than ours.
By the way, how did we decide on Mike? There are four areas that we look at with any staff hire at Compass Church:
1) Character – is this a person with excellent moral character, and are they growing in Christian maturity?
2) Call – Have they been called by God not only to ministry but to the kind of role they would be playing if they were hired?
3) Chemistry – Will this person be a good fit at Compass given our vision and values?
4) Competency – Finally, does this person have the ability to do the job not just adequately, but with excellence?
I’m excited about the fresh vision, energy, and ability that Mike will bring to our team. Again, this is all part of the larger plan to engage the community around us most effectively. I’m grateful to God and to you for making this critical piece of our ministry possible!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Ignite!
Nothing great that has ever been done happened without vision. It is the spark, the catalyst, the fuse, that ignites action.
Vision is critical, and yet it is killed by the critics. Critics, even casual in nature, push vision back into the box where they think it belongs. Critics, naysayers, cynics - they have done so much damage.
And yet I can’t deny their power in my life – how many times they’ve shoved me back in my place because I haven’t wanted to be seen in a negative light by them or anyone else.
But vision is the central element to everything. Vision comes from a core conviction that it can be done: we will win, the lost will be found, profit will be made, the plan will work, the dream will come true.
The problem with people like me who struggle with a mild case of ADHD is not that they lack vision; it’s that they lack focus. 5000 visions are great, but only one or two will do for a lifetime. So the challenge in the real world isn’t vision as much as it is discipline.
Discipline in this case is the ability to say no to the endless “goods” so you can remain in hot pursuit of the best – and it’s got to be done daily, even hourly, as the next in line behind the critic is the one who has got an opportunity that will blow you right off course.
But like a plant must get water to grow, vision must get fed the fertile food of time, reflection, and necessary adjustment. All of this requires concentration, which I’ve found as a husband, father of three, Lead Pastor, doctoral student, and most recently pastoral coach, is a rare commodity.
But all we have is today. All we have are the seconds that are ticking by. Tomorrow may not afford us as many opportunities as today. Let's not wait to find out.
Vision is critical, and yet it is killed by the critics. Critics, even casual in nature, push vision back into the box where they think it belongs. Critics, naysayers, cynics - they have done so much damage.
And yet I can’t deny their power in my life – how many times they’ve shoved me back in my place because I haven’t wanted to be seen in a negative light by them or anyone else.
But vision is the central element to everything. Vision comes from a core conviction that it can be done: we will win, the lost will be found, profit will be made, the plan will work, the dream will come true.
The problem with people like me who struggle with a mild case of ADHD is not that they lack vision; it’s that they lack focus. 5000 visions are great, but only one or two will do for a lifetime. So the challenge in the real world isn’t vision as much as it is discipline.
Discipline in this case is the ability to say no to the endless “goods” so you can remain in hot pursuit of the best – and it’s got to be done daily, even hourly, as the next in line behind the critic is the one who has got an opportunity that will blow you right off course.
But like a plant must get water to grow, vision must get fed the fertile food of time, reflection, and necessary adjustment. All of this requires concentration, which I’ve found as a husband, father of three, Lead Pastor, doctoral student, and most recently pastoral coach, is a rare commodity.
But all we have is today. All we have are the seconds that are ticking by. Tomorrow may not afford us as many opportunities as today. Let's not wait to find out.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Negotiating with Al-Mechanica
Okay, so here we go. This week I've had two cars that needed service. My Altima has had the "check engine" light on forever, even though the engine seemed to be running fine. So I take it in because I'm worried that eventually I'll have to pay the piper so I'd better just do the responsible thing.
So they tell me its some issue with the coolant sensor, which led to malfunctioning spark plugs, and $265 later I'm on my way.
BUT THEN!! This morning the "check engine" light goes on again. Hmmm.
So I take it back, (this is now the fourth time I've taken it in because of this coolant issue!) and they tell me, "Okay, well we'll put it back up on the rack and take a look." They haven't admitted guilt yet. And that bugs me. I want them to say, "Mr. Jacobs, we are so sorry, you should not have had to drive this car all the way back here... we should have fixed it right the first time. Your time is valuable and you have been one of our best customers."
But here's the deal I've never understood about car mechanics: are they like terrorists? Are you supposed to negotiate with them, or do they only understand the language of intimidation?
Seriously. I'm trying to be a nice, reasonable man. Why? Well, a) I have a Compass Church sticker on each of my cars, b) they have my car in their possession and c) I know basically nothing about cars. I take that back: I can change the air filter and put more coolant in as needed, all by myself.
I know that's pathetic, but everyone's got their gifts.
My issue is, what am I to think? Do I continue my posture of firm but courteous behavior, hoping that they'll say, "Now that's a nice guy, let's not cut the brake lines after all. In fact, let's solve his problem right away and at a fair price!"
Is that realistic? Or do they mock my attempts at civility when I get off the phone, saying, "This man is weak and we hold in him in contempt! We're going to slowly drain him of whatever cash he has by dismantling this car piece by piece!"
I don't know. All I know is I took the other car in there to get the oil changed and they rotated the tires and now it drives wierd.
I've thought many times about learning about the car maintanence thing so I could do some of these repairs myself. But I've decided against it because a) I love my family and would never intentionally put them in harm's way b) I have the patience of a gnat when it comes to this stuff and c) I'm just not really all that interested.
I wish there was a John Bolton of the auto mechanic world I could consult with on matters of this nature. But until then, I'll just have to go it alone...
So they tell me its some issue with the coolant sensor, which led to malfunctioning spark plugs, and $265 later I'm on my way.
BUT THEN!! This morning the "check engine" light goes on again. Hmmm.
So I take it back, (this is now the fourth time I've taken it in because of this coolant issue!) and they tell me, "Okay, well we'll put it back up on the rack and take a look." They haven't admitted guilt yet. And that bugs me. I want them to say, "Mr. Jacobs, we are so sorry, you should not have had to drive this car all the way back here... we should have fixed it right the first time. Your time is valuable and you have been one of our best customers."
But here's the deal I've never understood about car mechanics: are they like terrorists? Are you supposed to negotiate with them, or do they only understand the language of intimidation?
Seriously. I'm trying to be a nice, reasonable man. Why? Well, a) I have a Compass Church sticker on each of my cars, b) they have my car in their possession and c) I know basically nothing about cars. I take that back: I can change the air filter and put more coolant in as needed, all by myself.
I know that's pathetic, but everyone's got their gifts.
My issue is, what am I to think? Do I continue my posture of firm but courteous behavior, hoping that they'll say, "Now that's a nice guy, let's not cut the brake lines after all. In fact, let's solve his problem right away and at a fair price!"
Is that realistic? Or do they mock my attempts at civility when I get off the phone, saying, "This man is weak and we hold in him in contempt! We're going to slowly drain him of whatever cash he has by dismantling this car piece by piece!"
I don't know. All I know is I took the other car in there to get the oil changed and they rotated the tires and now it drives wierd.
I've thought many times about learning about the car maintanence thing so I could do some of these repairs myself. But I've decided against it because a) I love my family and would never intentionally put them in harm's way b) I have the patience of a gnat when it comes to this stuff and c) I'm just not really all that interested.
I wish there was a John Bolton of the auto mechanic world I could consult with on matters of this nature. But until then, I'll just have to go it alone...
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